tawaki (tawaki) wrote in myst_library,

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Humor -- "Things I am not allowed to do in D'ni"

In-spire-d by the HP Things I Am Not Allowed to Do at Hogwarts. Some of these were shamelessly ripped off from there too.

1: I will not sing "The Badger Song" on Teledahn.

2: I will not sing "I Told the Witch-Doctor" on Serenia.

3: I will not draw obscene pictures on the Slates.

4: I will not paper Noloben with Snakes on a Plane posters.

5: I will not offer to prepare tandoori grossamery.

6: I will never ask Esher why one pattern is not merging into another.

7: The Tablet has no medications in it.

8: I will not throw Sirrus' crystal bombs around and yell "Zeeky boogy doog!"

9: The Wahrk Gallows is not a jungle gym.

10: I will not, on the lava room platform on Voltaic, jump around waving a ring and yelling "PRECIOUS!" over and over.

11: Gehn has no idea what a Death Star is.

12: I will not yell "PWNED!" at Saavedro when he's trapped between the shields.

13: When Gehn executes a rebel, I will not call it a wahrkout.

14: I will not call Gehn a "swaggering overbearing tin-plated dictator with delusions of godhood" to his face.

15: I will not break the windows on the Mazerunner, however tempting it may be.

16: I will not use the Waffle Iron for culinary purposes.

17: I will not say "THE ALIENS ARE COMING!" on Todelmer.

18: I will not write "Macarena" on a Slate.

19: I will not go up and down 37 with a pasteboard sign reading "The end of the world is nigh."

20: I will not share what Freud would say about my experiences in Dream.

21: I will not share what Freud would say about anyone else's experiences in Dream.

22: I will not start talking like Cho if I speak fluent D'ni.

23: I will not write "Veovis was here" on Tahgira. He probably wasn't.

24: I will not say "I think it's going to rain" on Eder Kemo.

25: I will not call Lanaren "King Methusaleh."

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